Welcome to the `Hillary Supporter Translation Guide', a page for people who're confused by the vacant ramblings of dangerously uninformed Hillary Clinton supporters. If you've had the misfortune of encountering a Hillbot, you've probably heard them utter one of the phrases below. This page offers a clear and authoritative translation of `Hillspeak'.
| What Hillary Supporters Say | What Hillary Supporters Mean |
|---|---|
| “She would be the first woman President.” | “I see gender as a qualification.” |
| “Vote blue no matter who.” | “I would vote for George W. Bush if he wore a blue tie.” |
| “Hillary is very qualified.” | “Hillary has been on CNN more than the other guy.” |
| “She has plans.” | “I have no idea what plans she has.” |
| “Hillary has been endorsed by lots of prominent people.” | “I revere authority and like being told what to think.” |
| “Bernie is a socialist.” | “I’m in the wrong party.” |
| “She’s better than Trump.” | “Don’t look at Hillary. Just focus on Trump. He’s bad.” |
| “It’s her turn.” | “I think the United States is a monarchy.” |
| “If you don’t vote for Hillary, you’re helping Trump.” | “Maybe I can shame you into voting the way I want with some fallacious reasoning.” |
| “Do the math.” | “I haven’t done the math.” |
| “That’s just how the system works.” | “I have no fight left in me because I’m dead inside.” |
| “It’s all Republican lies.” | “I don’t need to dispute the things you say. Blue team good. Red team bad. Ooga booga!” |
| “Hillary has already won because CNN said so." | “I don't know how the super delegate system works because I'm a tool.” |
| “I don't care about the things you say Hillary has done.” | “I forgot how to be a Progressive.” |
| “You won't vote for her? Then say hello to President Trump." | “I'm preparing for defeat, and I'm preparing to blame you for it.” |
| “Bernie just wants to give you free stuff.” | “I would sooner vote against my own interests than look at how other countries have made Bernie's policies work.” |
| “She will continue Obama's work." | “I like the status quo. Change? No we can't!” |
| “I don't care about the emails.” | “I don't care about transparency or accountability.” |
| “She's inspirational and a role model.” | “She's female." |
| “Hillary has experience and knows her way around politics.” | “I don't know what corruption is, but I think it has something to do with Karl Rove. He's the devil.” |
| “She'll release her Wall Street transcripts when the Republicans do.” | “I hold Hillary to the standards of Republicans.” |
| “You're just sexist.” | “I'd rather demonize you than argue with you.” |
| “Stop being divisive” | “Vote for my divisive candidate.” |
If you'd like help translating other phrases Hillary supporters use, place them in a comment below and I'll see about adding them to the list.
